When I was seven, I dreamt of having a castle and be treated as a princess. I wanted to be like Cinderella, Snow White, Belle, Aurora and Ariel (Yes, I dreamt of being a mermaid!). I want to have housemaids, wear gowns even at an ordinary day and be part of a royal gatherings.
When I was ten, I dreamt of being a majorette. I even asked what degree course I should take just to be a majorette. I also wanted to be a mall saleslady. I want to be dressed like them, gorgeous, presentable and stunning!
When I was about twelve, I dreamt of being a cheerleader. I wanted to dance, flip my body and be thrown up on air just what I see in cheering teams.
When I was in my early teenage life, I dreamt of having reach fame. I wanted to be known by the people everywhere. I also wanted to be a beauty queen (there’s no harm in dreaming! lol) and wear crown.
When I was in my mid-teenage years, I dreamt of being a lawyer. Very fulfilling it was for me to see women in suit, speaking in straight English, fighting for something they believe is right. And furthermore, having won cases.
I dreamt of having my prince too. I want to have the love that lasts for a lifetime. I wanted to have that someone who will stick with me whatever it will take. He’s gonna be the ‘one’ I’m gonna make a happily-ever-after-story with.
When I was in my late-teenage years, I dreamt of having finished my course. I want to graduate on time, so everybody would be proud of me.
Now that I am twenty, I have realized lots of things from my zealous dreams way back then. There, EVERYTHING HAPPENS FOR A REASON AND HAS ITS MEANING.
Now that I am a growing up, I realized that being a princess doesn’t only mean living in a palace, wearing a crown on the head, eating sumptuous foods, wearing elegant gowns, wearing luxurious jewelries and accessories, attending royal events and being part of a royal family in a kingdom. Cause sometimes, being a princess means being true to yourself—being the person you really are, someone you used to be. Sometimes, the best crown is the crown of glory, being achieved through hardwork, unlimited effort and dedication. Sometimes, the best jewel a princess can ever wear is her smile. The biggest event doesn’t only happen during royal gatherings. It can happen everyday as long as I choose to be happy each day and the biggest crowd I can ever have is the world itself—full of strangers, who can possibly be part of my life.
Now that I am growing up, I came to realizing that the best road a majorette can ever pave is the road towards success. There is never a straight road and life is not about a smooth-sailing ride. There would be the street full of rocks. However, every obstacle would make me stronger and more mature. They would hone me to be a better individual as I am today. I should walk [rain or shine], gradually inching myself towards success.
Growing up means, finding happiness everywhere, seeing the more positive side of the world and saying ‘NO’ to pessimism. Back then, I dreamt of being a cheerleader. Now, I realized that everybody could become cheerleader as long as we know what happiness really means. And happiness can only be found in the heart of someone who knows contentment, forgiveness and positivity. There is no use being thrown up and having a flexible body just to be a cheerleader. As long as one knows how to radiate all the positive vibes and goodness among thy neighbors, one could really become the best cheerleader in the greatest arena of life full of grandeur.
Years passed and my old dream of being famous and being a beauty queen doesn’t vanish yet (Cheers!). But not at the same perspective as I had seen it before. Cause [as a grown-up], I’d say, the most beautiful woman in the world is someone who is not afraid to show the world who she really is. Someone who doesn’t dare to compare herself to anybody else. Someone who sees the world in a more optimistic ways. Someone who put great values in the smallest things. Someone who value and make her family and loved ones her priorities. And most importantly, someone who honors and loves God in front of everyone. There, I realized that being famous and be known [especially in the face of social media] is never an important matter. Being known by few but real people would suffice.
I am taking up BA Sociology for I really wanted to be a good lawyer someday. This was my childhood dream and I still keep it inside the pocket of my ripped jeans. Kidding aside, I still keep it in my heart. At a random corner of my mind, I can still see myself in a formal suit, speaking in straight English in front of the jury, in the Supreme Court and fighting for the right and what I believe is true and just.
But at the peripheral view of it, I think of it in a more realistic way. I do not have to be a lawyer to practice what is right and avoiding and prohibiting what is wrong. I must be honest, and will always stick at the side of what is true. The law has its own power, what lacks is the strong implementation of it across the archipelago. At the end of the day, my desire of being a lawyer, still linger on my dreams… until now.
Everybody wishes to have the prince or their princess to fin’lly come into their lives. From childhood, to teenage years, to twenty’s, thirty’s and so on, one sees herself being surrounded around the arms of the love of her life. I dreamt the same way too. I loved. I sacrificed. And at the end, I was hurt. Me, being a child, has a different point of view as I have today. Before, I thought loving is always a fantastic and magical thing, a blessing full of much delight. True, as it is. But I crossed the path of its affirmative side and realized that it is not always the same thing. I just said to myself that loving isn’t only a fantastic and magical thing. Loving can sometimes hurt. It can turn to a person into someone new. It can bring bitterness in the heart of someone and creep over the love that’s in. I also just said, blessed is the heart of someone who knows how to love, how to sacrifice and take all the risks for the one she loves the most.
A real grown-up believes in the power of education to change lives. Education is a seed of hope. Education is a sword which will be used by people against social problems and its roots. Education will be the best accomplishment one can ever acquire. It is something that cannot be stolen. So used and overheard as it may seem but it will always remain true for a lifetime. As we grow up, we must instill in ourselves the value of education and make it something worth having. For after all the sacrifices one invests in the four corners of the institution, it’ll be worth it in the end.
I am still paving my way to the achievement of education on the wide ground of UP. I am pursuing my Sablay (no matter how long it takes) for me to have something I can forever be proud of. When this happens, I will be the happiest girl in the world and I will dedicate it whole-heartedly to all the persons I love and who served as my inspiration as I go along.
I am not still a grown-up lady I still consider myself young, childish and immature. The world is a fast-paced environment and I have lots of time to enjoy every bit of it like a typical kid does. I have too many things to be learned; too many adventures to dare with; too many challenges to take on; much people to meet and many random things to still realize. However, I believe, I am gradually growing up. Maybe not in the eyes of everyone around me but I know it myself, at least. And I know that as I go along, God will forever be my guidepost to light my darkest, creepiest path.
Growing up takes time. Growing up isn’t an instant phenomenon. We don’t wake up one day realizing we’ve grown up already. Growing up can also be subjective. It varies among people. But one thing is for sure—we all grow up. And from there, we come to realize lots of things.
Growing old is mandatory. GROWING UP is optional. You, it’s up to you.