How to move on from an ex

Have you ever been in love with someone yet got broken in the end? Have you felt like your world is collapsing after being left behind by someone you love? Have you ever felt so much dire broken upon losing the love of your life? If yes, you’re on the right page. Here’s a list of things that you can do for you to incrementally skip from the ocean of melancholy and make yourself get over of all these broken-heartedness and miserable pain.

Disclaimer: I am not this expert, admittedly. I do not have much experiences from being hurt and broken. I am declaring all my experiences and biases. But I am trying to share some thoughts and insights with you and I hope I could help you out.

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1. Cry. Go and unleash the hard feelings inside of you. Brave people cry and it only takes a few who would dare to burst their feelings off of them.Crying is never, never a weakness. It’s more of a strength, I must say. Let go of the extreme emotions battling inside of you. There, you’ll get to realize that crying really helps. But dear, make sure, after you’ve cried and shed all the tears inside you, you’ll be strong and will stand up! You’ve let go of the load that burdens you and it’s now easier for you to go on with your life now.

2.  Write your feelings down. I am not saying that you post it online through your social media accounts. Remember, privacy would also inch you closely towards self-serenity. I am saying, you can go and grab a piece of paper and a pen and write down all your thoughts, all your feelings, all that you have in mind and in heart. Worry no more on the light matters like the syntax of your text or the choice of words you are going to use. It’s not always the grammar itself that matters the most. Grammar does not define an intelligent person. It’s the way you put into words your self-expressions and thoughts coming directly from your heart. Nobody’s gonna judge you. It is a way of releasing your emotions that will help you get back to your life more completely. Promise, this helps.

3. Unfollow his/her accounts. STOP STALKING… Just please. I know it’s hard to open your social media accounts without him appearing in the newsfeed. Or having not accepting any ‘Good morning and good night’ tweets from him/her. It’s a matter of strange thing when you don’t browse his/her profile and checking him/her from time to time. It seems like you lost half of your Facebook friends upon having blocked your ex. But it’s a must! Why would you go over a page when knowing something about them would just cause you pain and making you remember all the hurt that you had?

I also encourage you to delete all your photos together. Yes, you shared too many memories captured in the most random ways. But what’s the point of holding on to something your partner has already given up to? If this would be too harsh and you can’t let go of the past memories yet, save ONE. Just one photo and make sure it’s your best shot. (lol) Maybe you can stare at this photo again when the time has already came that you have already moved on from this bitter reality of the past. You’ll clearly see a selfie of you (and your ex) who have tackled different paths already now. You’ll look back at the past and will vividly remember all the hard things that happened around. Then you’ll be amazed how strong you’ve been after getting broken and hurt.

4. Stop texting your ex. Delete his contact from your list. Delete the thread of your conversation. Delete all the monthsary and sweet ‘good morning’ messages. Basically delete them all and never text him again. For you to move on, you have to cut all the means of communication and learn how to live a day without him, or something that reminds you of him.

5. Eat bananas. (This is so random.) Bananas are happy fruits! They contain serotonin, a neurotransmitter that helps fight depression. For more foods rich in serotonin, browse here. But this does not mean that when you eat bananas or foods that produce serotonin, you’ll be happy. No, it’s not like that. It’s just this would help you incline yourself towards But do not rely on foods alone! Get some exercise too just to get rid of excess fats (and to have a slimmer body as well).

6. Get along with friends. Have time with your barkadas. Go for a rendezvous, shopping, night out, strol at a park, perhaps watch a movie or just a pajama party at home. I’m sure, whoever your friends are, you are enjoying their company. You might not know, they are missing you, too? That when you had your ex-partner, you’ve got less time for your friends. Dear, they are those crazy lovable people who will never ever pull you down and cause you  pain. Look for an incomparable happiness. Because the happiness you can get from your friends is a kind of enthusiasm and a mirror of love which sees the best part of you. This is the kind of love that does not ask anything in return.

7. Pamper yourself. Remember that you are too beautiful to suffer from pain. You deserve a time for yourself. Go get some full body massage, a make over, posh nails or a haircut… or something which you know brings happiness to you. You already know it. Reward yourself with all the positive things in life. And you’ll see eventually, these positive glow will radiate back to you. And remember to smile. It’s your best accessory. 🙂

8. Do not enter in a new relationship yet. Why would you seek for someone who would “heal your wounds and mend the broken part of yours?” Mean, can’t you do it yourself? Yes, you can. Believe me. You don’t need someone who would catch you this time. Let all the pain vanish by itself. Eventually, it will. Let yourself recover from this kind of misery. Maybe it’s a platform for you to have a time for yourself alone. Search thy soul, deal with the optimistic part of your life and be happy… without even having someone.

9. Discard all the material things he/she has given you. If possible, I mean, if you can, throw the things that constantly remind him of you. From the dried petals of the flowers he first gave you; the stuff toy as his present for your anniversary/monthsary; the tissue you brought home on your first date; your ‘couple shirt’; the pictures framed on your wall or that you put in your wallet; his promise ring; his love letters.. etcetera. (Guess I’ve mentioned a lot). But the bottom line is, fix your things and put all the things that remind him in a box perhaps or better yet, put them on trash. And remember, regret has no room.

10. Make yourself busy. Perhaps browse your notebook and handouts? Haha. Kidding, devote your time to something productive. Focus on things that need your attention. Indulge yourself to activities which you know you will enjoy. Life is too short to be wasted. Don’t let time pass by you without making the most of it. Carpe diem! Seize the day. Finish your tasks, your works or the things you prioritize. I’m sure, by investing your time to these kinds of stuffs, you’ll have the chance to divert your attention and forget your ex eventually.

11. Be a better version of yourself. This is a phase in your life where you’ll have the opportunity to evaluate yourself and have a little glimpse of what and who you’ve become. Instead of soaking yourself in a corner, why not start discovering a peculiar side of yours? Discover your hidden talents, develop your skills and try different things you have interest at. See yourself in the spotlight. Aside from dressing up,  no you don’t have to. You’re beautiful enough.  Just find your inner strengths and have a source of motivation. And if ever time will come that you and your ex’s paths cross, he/she’ll see a new, different and better you… Version 2.0   😉

12. Pray. Believe that God will give you the person you deserve. Maybe not today, not now. But in the right and perfect time. There is one concrete reason why you have to split up with your ex– he/she is not the one for you. There is always this someone who waits for your arrival too. And God will always create the ways for your paths to meet. He knows when and where and how. Believe that there is someone far, far better than your ex. And God will lead you to him/her. Just wait patiently. Chillax! And have the belief in your heart that God will heal all the wounds and remove all the scars.

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Well that’s it! F-to the effin’ yeah! This is for those who have the broken hearts with them still. Go and cheer up, sweeties! That horrible pain you are currently suffering from is a blessing. This will inch you towards a better version of yourself. It’ll make you real stronger. You’ll come out wiser. And when the time comes that you have already found the one– the love of your life– I’ll be the one by your side cheering you on. You will move on from this. Give your heart a time to recover. And when you’ve successfully gone through this, you’ll have the firmer heart with you.

Cheers to all those broken hearts and souls!

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